


Beginning & End

by elevenoclock



Category: Cut & Run - Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux
Genre: Angst, Crash & Burn, M/M, Secondary Character POV, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-04
Updated: 2015-04-04
Packaged: 2018-03-21 05:03:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,725
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3678609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elevenoclock/pseuds/elevenoclock
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Five missing scenes from "Crash & Burn" from Kelly's point of view. (Plus one scene after the book concludes.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Fight & Flight

**Author's Note:**

> After reading "Crash & Burn" for the second time, I realized that I really wanted to know what Kelly was thinking and doing throughout this book. The focus was really on Ty, Zane, and Nick, but I think Nick isn't complete without Kelly beside him. Some of these chapters directly parallel events in the book, while others fit in between scenes.
> 
> I tried to avoid taking dialogue directly from "Crash & Burn", but if you recognize a line, it probably belongs to Abigail Roux!
> 
> (The explicit rating is for Chapter 3.)

They were five days into the three week adventure trek when the ground started to rumble underneath them. Kelly watched as the kids— teenagers, mostly sixteen and seventeen year olds who were used to surviving on the streets but completely clueless when it came to winter hikes in the woods— started to panic.

A glance at his watch had Kelly grinning to himself. Right on time. He was owed a few favors from some Army Rangers he’d met a few years back, although most people he knew would find the incoming avalanche to be a poor form of payback.

 _Actually_ , Kelly thought, _most of the people I know would think the avalanche is totally_ awesome _payback_. Digger was going to be so mad when he heard that Kelly had let some Army guys set off explosives instead of him. 

The bulk of the falling snow missed them, but enough of it hit their camp hard enough to destroy tents, extinguish the fire they’d set up, and knock kids over like bowling pins. Kelly grabbed a tree and held on until the avalanche had stopped, then moved into the camp to make sure everyone was alright.

“We’re gonna die out here!” one of the kids yelled, digging himself out of a snow pile.

Kelly laughed quietly. All he could think about was Nick from their trip last year, and his dramatic insistence that he was going to die in Scotland. That had been a fun trip, even with the murder and mayhem. Especially with the murder and mayhem— and the amazing sex, of course.

With a sigh, he shook his head, pushing the thoughts of Nick away. Time to assess the damage and get the kids back on their feet. There’d be time to think about Nick later.

***

Kelly wanted an award or something. A gold star, at the very least, for his restraint. He’d gotten home, unpacked his backpack and tossed the dirty clothes in the washer, and taken a long, hot shower before he’d turned his phone on and checked for messages from Nick. 

The non-existent messages from Nick.

“What the hell, Nicko?” he murmured. After three weeks in the woods, he’d expected at least a couple of dirty texts, maybe some voicemails. But the only notification that came up was a voicemail from Ty.

Ignoring the voicemail alert, Kelly tapped Nick’s number and put the phone to his ear. Maybe Nick had just been busy wrapping up cases. The phone rang on and on before finally kicking over to Nick’s voicemail, where a recording politely informed him that the voicemail box he was trying to reach was full.

A bit worried now, Kelly ended the call and pulled up Ty’s message. “Hey Doc,” Ty’s voice was nervous through the speaker, which had Kelly on alert immediately. “So, um, me and Zane kind of got married a couple of days ago?” He could hear Zane in the background, laughing. “Yeah, anyways, Digger and Johns are coming in this weekend, something about a belated bachelor’s party.” Kelly let his shoulders relax, laughing at the phone. Ty was a dork, but Zane was good for him. 

Ty rambled on for another minute, sounding happier and more relaxed than Kelly had heard him in a long time. He was winding down his message when he paused and added, “And, hey, if you get in touch with Nick, tell him I hope he’ll come, too?”

Kelly pulled the phone away from his ear, staring at it. _If you get in touch with Nick_ , Ty had said, which meant that _Ty_ hadn’t been able to get in contact with the redhead. And maybe Ty and Irish were having problems lately, but Kelly knew Nick would be there in a heartbeat if his best friend got married. Something wasn’t right.

Kelly pulled out his laptop, booked a flight into Baltimore, and forwarded the confirmation to Ty before trying Nick again.

Still no answer.

“Shit.”

***

By the time the plane touched down, Kelly had a raging headache. He’d been delayed six hours in Atlanta, and then the flight to Baltimore had canceled and they’d rebooked him on the next flight to DC instead. Added to that, the row behind him had a baby screaming at the top of her lungs. Kelly desperately needed a drink or two. And Nick. 

He filed off the plane, juggling his duffle and trying to turn his phone back on. The device was buzzing with alerts before he could even try to call Nick again. Half a dozen missed calls, from Owen, Digger, and, surprisingly, Zane. 

“Hey Doc,” Owen’s voicemail said, “Nick is here at Ty’s, and he’s totally okay. Really! He’s going to be fine. He’s been stabbed, and he’s lost some blood, but he’s awake now and he’ll be fine.”

Kelly felt the blood drain out of his face, and picked up the pace as he wove through other passengers in the terminal. Digger’s voicemail was next. “Shit, man, Ty’s on a warpath,” the Cajun said, sounding equally amused and alarmed. “Better get here as soon as you can. Lucky’s alright, but Ty… look, just get here.”

And finally Zane, succinct as usual, “Hey Kelly, call me as soon as you get this, okay?”

Kelly followed the signs for rental car pickups even as he dialed Zane back. “What’s going on?” he asked as soon as the call connected.

Zane sounded tired, but calm. “Where are you?” he asked.

“Just landed in DC. Gonna get a rental and drive down, I’ll be there soon.” He swallowed, then asked, “How is he?”

“Nick’s fine,” Zane said. “He lost a lot of blood, but Digger stitched him up.”

Oh, god. Kelly could already picture the rant that was going to go with that. Nick didn’t trust anyone but Kelly to come near him with a needle, and with there was no knowing what the Cajun would use for thread. 

“Look, Kelly,” Zane said, exhaling. “Nick showed up at the house and… he’d been gone for almost two weeks. Gave Owen a call to let him know he was heading out of town, and then vanished. Showed up last night dirty and covered in blood. He’s said some things that…” he trailed off.

“Some things that _what_?” Kelly prompted.

Zane exhaled again. “Not my place to say,” he said. “But it’d be better if you were here.”

Kelly ended the call as he got to the car rental desk, handing his credit card over without even asking the price. If Nick had been there with him, he’d have scored some kind of upgrade, and probably at a steep discount, but Nick… was apparently lying in Ty and Zane’s house, with a stab wound in him. 

He took the keys and was calling Zane back even as he got in the car and headed for the highway.

By the time he pulled up in front of the row house, he’d called Zane at least ten times, and worked himself up into a panic. He slammed the car into park, barely remembering to turn the engine off before he was up the steps and facing the taller man.

“What the hell?” Kelly couldn’t help it, he was freaking out. The lack of information, the fact that Nick had been out of communication for two weeks…

“He’s okay,” Zane repeated. 

“What happened, what’d he say?” Kelly pushed Zane into the house, following on his heels. “Where the hell has he been? How long was he missing? Where is he?”

He barely heard Zane’s response… just the words Liam Bell. 

Kelly pushed past Zane, followed Digger’s pointing to the stairs, and… was stopped dead in his tracks by Ty. Ty, who wouldn’t let him past.

It wasn’t often that Kelly wanted to punch one of his teammates, but he had to dig his fingers into the palm of his hand to stop himself from swinging out at Ty. He knew he was yelling, and Ty’s voice was raising to match.

“He killed Richard Burns in Scotland.”

Ty’s words stopped Kelly dead in his tracks.

“He what?”

It was the most ridiculous thing Ty could have said. Kelly would have believed him more if he’d said that Nick had joined up with the Irish mob again, or that he’d abandoned his love of the Sox and was now a Yankees fan. But this?

It was Owen who convinced him, agreeing with Ty. 

And then Ty made it worse. “Just be prepared, okay? He’s handcuffed to the bed so he can’t escape.”

Kelly felt cold all over, and suddenly he couldn’t breathe. “You handcuffed him?” he asked, not recognizing his own voice. Suddenly this wasn’t Ty in front of him, wasn’t his Six anymore, it was another enemy. Someone who had tied Nick down. Nick, who still woke up from nightmares in the middle of the night, who had physically escaped that cell in the desert but would always have a piece of it in the back of his mind. 

He wasn’t even aware of what he said, just knew that his words were hurting Ty, hitting him right in the gut. _Good_ , he thought. Then he was pushing past Ty, climbing the stairs and pushing the bedroom door open.

Nick was gone. The room was empty of his lover, and all that he’d left behind were bloody sheets, a pair of handcuffs, and a note stuck to the wall. _Twenty-three days, nine hours, and fifty-one minutes._


	2. Lie & Cheat (& Steal)

The thought of Irish and Bell being paired together for this mission was enough to put Kelly in a foul mood as he followed Ty into the back entrance of the Washington, D.C. FBI office. Added on to that the knowledge that they were using Liam as bait, and putting Nick at risk at the same time, and Kelly knew he was a mess. 

He focused on Ty’s footsteps, bypassing security and slipping through the service door into the building. It wasn’t a foolproof plan by far, but Ty had worked in this building before and knew the layout and camera blind spots. And, of course, the fact that the bulk of the security force had gone running when Bell had been picked up by the facial recognition software definitely helped.

The belongings and files of the late Director Richard Burns were supposedly stored in the archives, which were kept below street level in the building’s basement. 

The door to the archive was unlocked, miracle of miracles, and they slipped into the dark room. Lights overhead flickered on, motion-detector switches catching their entrance. 

“I always hated coming down here,” Ty murmured. 

Kelly stared. The room was massive, with heavy industrial shelving spanning as far as the eye could see. Each shelf contained stacks of paper boxes, neatly labeled. “It’s like the library from hell,” he said. “How are we going to find anything in here?”

Ty pointed to the two ancient computers just inside the door. “All of the case and personnel files that get archived are assigned a number that designates a row and shelf location.” He tapped at the keyboard, waking the computer from its screensaver, and typed BURNS, RICHARD into the search box that came up.

“There,” he said, pointing at the screen. “Let’s go.”

The shelf they were directed to wasn’t that far from the door thankfully. But that was where their luck ended; the shelf had a dozen boxes on it, all bearing Burn’s name and the date of their archival.

“This is going to take forever,” Kelly said.

“We don’t have forever,” Ty pointed out. He pulled the first box off the shelf and handed it to Kelly, then grabbed another for himself. “Start digging. Look for keywords only, anything related to de la Vega, me, or Zane.”

They sat on the floor, pulling stack after stack of papers from the boxes and flipping through them frantically. Kelly could feel his eyes glazing over by his third box, and Ty’s repeated looks at his watch weren’t helping.

Both of them froze as the archive room’s door swung open with a creak. “Hello, anyone down here?” a woman called out, having spotted the lights on.

“Shit,” Ty whispered. “Go distract her, I’ll finish up here.”

“Me?” Kelly looked panicked. “Distract her how? Don’t make me do the talking, you’re better at this kind of thing.”

“You’ll be fine,” Ty hissed. “Tell her you’re with IT. No one ever asks questions when you say you’re from IT.”

Kelly swallowed, pushing himself to his feet. “I can’t do this,” he said.

“Go, you’ll be fine.”

With one last look at Ty, who had already resumed pouring over the files, Kelly wiped his hands on his jeans and moved to the front of the room.

There was a young woman standing next to the computer when he walked out of the aisle, and she jumped at his appearance.

“Hi,” Kelly said. He bit his lip, then added, “Working late?”

The woman nodded uncertainly. “Yeah. You don’t look familiar. What department are you with?”

“I’m with IT,” Kelly said. “Just down here to, uh…” he hesitated, then his eye caught on the search computers. “Just here to look into upgrading the archive computers.”

The girl relaxed at those words. “Oh, wow, it’s about time,” she said. “These old heaps are slow as molasses.” She grinned, and Kelly started to relax. “Honestly, you guys need to upgrade the entire building though. I mean, really, how many megahertz are these things running? We’re not in the 90’s anymore, right?” She laughed.

Kelly laughed with her, but it sounded strained even to his own ears. “Yeah,” he said, getting desperate now. “The megahertz are, um, pretty low aren’t they?”

Now the woman was frowning. “What’d you say your name was again?”

Ty chose that moment to reappear, a knight in shining armor. “Hey, Freddy,” he said, clapping Kelly on the shoulder and flashing the woman a bright grin. “Let’s call it a night and head out for a couple of beers. We’ll get this problem fixed in the morning.”

Kelly let Ty drag him out of the room and away from the woman’s questioning gaze.


	3. Hot & Sweaty

Nick closed the door to the cabin, fingering the shotgun spray in the wood. He tensed when Kelly came up behind him, then relaxed when Kelly wrapped his arms around Nick’s waist, pressing his face into Nick’s back.

“Everyone settled for the night?” The words were low, muffled by Nick’s t-shirt.

“Yeah,” Nick responded. “We dragged the mattresses out of the bunk room. They’ll sort themselves out.”

“Good,” Kelly said, pulling back enough to turn Nick around in his arms. “God, I’ve missed this.”

Nick leaned forward, bumping his nose against Kelly’s cheek, letting their breathing mingle together for a minute. “I’ve missed _you_ ,” he said.

“Romantic,” Kelly teased. “Are you and Ty going to be alright?”

“Yeah, eventually,” Nick said. “He’s still pissed that you shot him, by the way.”

Kelly snorted. “Like you’ve never wanted to do that,” he pointed out. 

“Fair enough.” Nick laughed softly. “But I don’t really want to talk about Tyler right now.”

“Oh?” Kelly’s eyes flashed silver in the dim light of the room. “What _do_ you want to talk about, then?”

Nick growled, finally pushing them both away from the door and towards the bed. “Was kinda hoping,” he said, emphasizing the last word with a push that sent Kelly toppling back onto the bed, “not to be doing any talking at all.”

Kelly stretched out on the sheets, looking up at Nick. “What about everyone out in the salon?” he asked, reaching out to pull Nick down with him. 

“What about ‘em?”

“Door’s kinda got a few holes in it,” Kelly said. 

Nick frowned, straddling Kelly’s waist and propping himself up with both hands on the mattress beside Kelly’s shoulders. “Suddenly feeling shy, Doc?”

Kelly shrugged. “Anyone could hear us,” he said. His eyes narrowed, a wicked grin teasing at the corner of his lips. “Or could come by and see us through the gunshot holes.”

A flare of heat unraveled up Nick’s spine, and he groaned. “Christ, Kels,” he said. “Dirty.”

“You love it,” Kelly said.

Nick just closed the distance and kissed him, hard and deep. He kissed like he was drowning, and Kelly responded with everything he had. 

For a minute, Kelly shut his eyes and let himself forget about everything that had happened, the explosion, the threat that everyone he loved had almost died, and just let Nick wash over him. 

Then he ran his hands over Nick’s shoulders, felt the muscles tense and knotted, the faint tremor running through his arms. Kelly opened his eyes and looked into Nick’s, the normally bright green eyes dim with exhaustion and worry. 

“How are you doing?”

“Fine, Doc,” Nick said. “I’m fine.”

“Liar.”

That got him a frustrated sigh. “I thought we weren’t talking,” Nick said.

Kelly ran his hands down Nick’s back, then back up to his neck, carding his fingers through the curls. He was a healer, and watching his lover hurting in front of him while knowing there was nothing he could do to help was crushing. 

“Alright,” Kelly finally said. “Alright, no more talking,” and pulled Nick down to him. 

This time when Nick kissed him, it was painful and violent, messy. He bit Kelly’s lip, soothed the pain with his tongue, felt more than heard Kelly’s groan beneath him. 

Nick was wearing a ragged pair of sweats and a threadbare t-shirt, which was two pieces of clothing too much. Kelly tugged at the shirt, and Nick pulled away just long enough to yank it off over his head before he was pressing Kelly flat against the bed and rubbing his thigh against Kelly’s cock.

“Not gonna last long if you keep that up, Irish,” Kelly breathed, arching and tugging at Nick’s hair. 

There was a cry and a thump from the room next door, followed by a groan. Ty’s voice carried through the wall, calling Zane’s name. Nick huffed a laugh. “Not gonna last long if _they_ keep _that_ up,” he said. “Like listening to porn, Jesus.”

“Then let’s drown them out,” Kelly said.

Nick accepted the challenge with a grin, kissing Kelly one more time before sliding down the bed to tug Kelly’s jeans and briefs off at the same time. “Want to hear you, Doc,” he said, before licking a stripe up Kelly’s cock and swallowing him down.

Kelly was sure that he made a noise, but he couldn’t hear it over the blood pounding in his ears. He arched off the bed, but Nick pushed him back with an arm across his abs.

“Nick, Nicko, want you in me. Please.” Kelly knew he sounded desperate, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. 

Nick pulled off Kelly’s cock with an obscene sound that had Kelly moaning, diving for the lube in the bedside drawer. He was back a split second later, before Kelly could catch his breath, and sucked the head of Kelly’s cock back into his mouth at the same time he slid one oiled finger behind his balls, teasing the sensitive skin there before shoving it into Kelly’s ass. A second finger quickly joined it, stretching, and Kelly could feel himself tipping over the edge.

“Gonna come, Irish,” he said urgently.

The mouth on his cock and the fingers vanished at the same time, and Kelly groaned, reaching out for Nick who was rolling off the bed and standing. He gave Kelly a heated look, tugging his sweat pants off and kicking them away. He gave his own shaft a couple of pulls, coating himself with lube, and then he was back on top of Kelly, kissing him as he lined up.

Their eyes met again, and Nick pushed in, not breaking eye contact until he was fully bottomed out. “Feel so good, Doc. Perfect.”

“Then fuck me,” Kelly said.

Nick pulled back, eyes fluttering shut with the sensation, then snapped his hips forward, causing them both to groan. Another snap, and then Nick was moving, short, hard thrusts that grazed Kelly’s prostate over and over.

They were both exhausted, nerves shattered, and Kelly knew he wasn’t going to last long. He wrapped his hand around his cock, jacking himself in time to Nick’s brutal pace.

“God, please,” Kelly begged. “So close.”

“Want to hear you, Kels,” Nick said, biting his shoulder and grazing his teeth along Kelly’s throat. “Come on, say my name.” He pulled almost all the way out, then rammed back in, rocking the bed into the wall and forcing a shout from Kelly.

“Nick,” Kelly said, his hand blurring on his cock. “God, Nick, so good.”

“Come for me, Doc,” Nick said, and Kelly obeyed, spilling over his hand with a cry that echoed in the bedroom. He felt Nick’s hand wrap around his own, jacking him through the orgasm until he was spent.

“So good,” Kelly repeated. He wrapped a leg around Nick’s waist, pulling him closer on the next thrust. “Use me, babe,” he said. “Want you to come in me so hard that I’m feeling it for days.”

“Kels, love you.” Nick sound wrecked, but his eyes looked bright and alive for the first time since Kelly had snuck onto the boat to find him after Bell had stabbed him. 

“Love you too, Irish,” Kelly said. 

Nick thrust hard once more, then froze, and Kelly could feel him coming inside him, could feel every muscle in Nick’s body finally releasing their tension.

They slumped to the bed together, Kelly twisting his fingers through the short hairs at the base of Nick’s neck, breathing heavily and letting the cool air of the room run over them.

From the room next door, they could hear Ty and Zane laughing. There was a moment of silence, and then Ty’s panicked voice suddenly cutting through the calm.

“Did Ty just ask Zane if he broke his wrist?” Kelly asked.

Nick looked at the wall separating them from his best friend as though it would provide him with the answer. 

“I broke your wrist!” Ty shouted.

Kelly looked at Nick, and they both burst into laughter at the same time. “Oh, god,” he said. 

“Corpsman up,” Nick managed through his own laughter.

“Christ, those two,” Kelly said. “There goes the afterglow.” He rolled out from under Nick, grabbing his jeans off the ground and tugging them up over his hips. His med bag was sitting on the floor next to his duffle, and he dug out a makeshift splint kit. “I’m gonna go rescue the newlyweds,” he said, moving back to the bed to give Nick a kiss. “Keep the bed warm for me?”

“Of course,” Nick winked.

Kelly turned to go, then spotted the tube of lube on the bed where Nick had tossed it. With a laugh, he grabbed that as well, and left before Ty could get worked up any further.


	4. Rock & a Hard Place

Perimeter checks in Texas reminded Kelly of Afghanistan. It was hot and dry during the day, but the temperature dropped at night, and it was flat and empty for miles in every direction. The stars above his head were bright like he’d only ever seen from his cabin in Colorado. 

He could hear the scuff of a boot off to his left, knew it was Owen, but couldn’t see his teammate even with the crescent moon lighting his path. To his right was a dark building, the sound of horses giving it away as the barn. 

Another scuff, this one from behind him, and Kelly had his gun in his hand and pointed at the trespasser before he could take another step.

“Just me, Doc.”

Nick’s voice, but the outline of the man before him wasn’t the tall, confident figure that Kelly was used to seeing. His shoulders were hunched, hands tucked in his jean pockets. Nick took another step, and Kelly could finally make out his face in the dim light. 

“Scared me, babe,” Kelly said, forcing his voice to stay calm as he re-holstered the gun. 

“Sorry.” Nick stood there for another second, watching Kelly. His eyes looked dull in the gray light, and his skin looked almost sickly pale.

“Come here, Irish.” Kelly kept his voice low, soothing, and held his hand out like he was trying to tame a scared animal.

Nick didn’t move.

“Come on,” Kelly repeated. “Walk with me for a bit.”

Finally, Nick took one step, then another, until he slid his hand into Kelly’s and laced their fingers together.

Kelly turned and headed towards the barn, inhaling the scent of desert and horses. He’d always loved animals, knew Nick did too, but that wasn’t their destination right now. Instead, he walked along the side of the building, pulling Nick with him until they turned the corner and the barn was between them and the rest of the ranch.

“Little privacy,” Kelly explained, leaning against the wooden wall and tugging Nick until he stepped between his legs. 

Nick shivered in the cold, hunching in on himself further. “I just want this to be done with,” he said.

“I know, babe,” Kelly said. He slid one of his hands into the back pockets of Nick’s jeans, pulling him closer until there wasn’t any space left between their bodies. The other hand he kept twined with Nick’s. “I thought I lost you, before. When Liam drove up and you weren’t in the car with him…”

“I kept thinking about you, when I was alone in that room, cuffed to the wall,” Nick said. “Kept thinking that I hadn’t told you enough how much I loved you.”

Kelly brushed a kiss against Nick’s mouth. “I don’t need to hear the words,” he said. “That’s one thing I’ve never doubted.”

Nick kissed him back, and he tasted like cigarettes and Gatorade… but underneath that, the salt of the ocean that Kelly had always associated with him.

“What Liam said before,” Kelly started, but Nick cut him off with a quiet groan. 

“I don’t want to talk about him,” Nick said.

But Kelly wasn’t finished. “What he said,” he repeated, squeezing Nick’s hand in emphasis. “He was wrong.”

Nick snorted. “He was wrong about a lot of things.” He paused, and then added, “Which time are you talking about?”

“You haven’t lost anything. You still have your skills, your aim, everything that makes you, you.” Kelly kissed him again. “You’re _still_ god damned beautiful.”

“Ty doesn’t think I should go to Miami tomorrow.”

Kelly sucked in a breath. “He said that?”

“No, but I could tell he was thinking it.”

“Then Ty’s wrong,” Kelly said, adamant. “We need you. We can’t do this without you, Irish.”

Nick’s voice, when he spoke, was barely audible. “I’m a liability,” he whispered.

“You’re not,” Kelly insisted. 

“How can you know that for certain?”

Kelly kissed him again, then tugged their still-joined hands up until they were at eye level. “I know,” he said, “because your hand hasn’t shaken once since I took it.”

Nick was silent, his eyes staring at their entwined hands as though he’d never seen them before.

“Like I said, babe,” Kelly said. “You haven’t lost a damn thing.”


	5. Alive & Kicking

Owen found him in the middle of the hallway, two orderlies and a nurse trying to physically restrain him.

Kelly looked terrible, pale and shaking, blood on his arm dripping to the floor where he’d torn his IV out. He was barefoot, and looked almost frail with the thin hospital gown around his shoulders, but the three people trying to hold him down said that he was anything but.

The scene alone was frightening enough to stop Owen dead in his tracks, and more than a few people were ducking into patient rooms or cowering away from the scene. But more terrifying than anything else, Owen realized, was the fact that Kelly was completely silent.

Their Devil Doc had always lived up to that name, and Owen couldn’t remember ever seeing him like this before, desperate and hurt and not making a single damned sound other than the dry sobs that shook his entire body.

“Get me 15 mg of Midazolam,” one of the nurses called.

That broke Owen from his trance, and he darted forward. “Wait,” he said. “Don’t drug him yet. Let me talk to him.”

None of the people restraining him let him go, but Kelly visibly calmed at hearing Owen’s voice. “Johns?” he said, voice cracking.

Owen moved into Kelly’s line of sight. “Yeah, I’m here Doc. You’ve gotta calm down, or the nurse is going to give you something to make you, alright?” He took a step closer and, when Kelly relaxed even further, another step.

The orderlies let Kelly go, and he slumped forward into Owen’s arms.

“Thought everyone was dead,” Kelly said. His voice was faint and scratchy, and Owen realized that he’d probably inhaled smoke from the explosion. That explained the silence; screaming would have hurt too much.

Owen wrapped an arm around Kelly’s waist, holding him up. A nurse hovered at the other end of the hallway, injection in hand, but Owen shook his head and waved her off. “Let’s get you back into bed, let the nurses put your IV back in.”

Kelly shook his head. “Just tell me, Ozone,” he pleaded.

Owen exhaled and nodded. “Ty and Zane are both still unconscious. They jumped out of a second story window, and Ty has a broken arm, but they should wake up any time now. Digger’s awake and complaining about the hospital food, trying to convince the nurses to give him a sponge bath.” He stopped there, watching Kelly.

Kelly met his gaze. “Tell me,” he said.

“Nick… the knife got him really good. First responders to the scene thought he was dead at first, they could barely find a pulse.”

The blood drained from Kelly’s face. “Thought he was dead?” he repeated.

“They managed to get him in an ambulance, into the OR, but they say he’s stable now.” Owen tightened his grip as Kelly almost collapsed. “He hasn’t woken up yet. The doc said that’s a good thing for now, means he’s healing.”

“He’s alive?” Kelly’s words were a whisper.

“Yeah, Doc. He’s alive. The lucky bastard.”

Now Kelly did collapse, and Owen followed him to the ground, helping him to the cold tile and holding him close as Kelly started to sob.

“Hey, Abbott, the nurses are giving me dirty looks. Let’s get you back to bed, alright?”

“No,” Kelly said. “I need to see him.”

Owen cursed the stubbornness of his teammate, but Kelly’s voice made it clear that he wasn’t going to be swayed on this. “Why don’t we let the nurse at least bandage your arm first?” he tried.

Kelly looked down at his arm, surprised to find it torn and bloody. He didn’t even remember yanking the IV out, didn’t remember anything after waking up to the beeping machine with his entire body aching and his throat on fire, up until Owen had found him in the hallway. “It’s fine,” he said absently. He looked back up. “Take me to see him. Please.”

Ignoring the nurse, Owen helped Kelly back to his feet and led him down the hallway. Kelly moved slowly, his body a riot of bruises, but he didn’t slow or stop to rest, just put one foot in front of the other.

Nick’s room was dim and quiet except for the beeping of machines. Owen helped Kelly to the chair next to the bed, then moved back to the door once Kelly had taken Nick’s hand in his own. 

The nurse was waiting for him, and she looked pretty damn upset. “I really must insist that Mr. Abbott return to his room now,” she said. “Visiting hours start at 9am tomorrow, and he can return then.”

“No,” Kelly said. He didn’t move from Nick’s bedside, didn’t look away from Nick’s face. 

“You need to be in a bed, Mr. Abbott,” the nurse insisted. “You suffered serious damage to your lungs from the smoke, and your ribs--”

“I said no,” Kelly repeated. He didn’t raise his voice, just stated the words calmly. One hand brushed Nick’s cheek, thumb rubbing over his bottom lip.

Owen rubbed his eyes. “Look,” he said. “Can’t you just… I don’t know. Set another bed up in here? You’re not going to get him out of here without sedating him, and if you want to do that you’re going to have to go through me.”

“It’s against regulations,” the nurse began.

“Look at him,” Owen said. “Nothing short of the end of the world is going to drag him from this room. Just get another bed in here.”

The nurse opened her mouth to refuse, then sighed. “I’ll see what I can do,” she said.

“Thank you,” Owen said. He looked at Kelly one last time, then moved outside the door, closing it gently behind him. He’d stand guard here, make sure no one bothered his brothers tonight.


	6. (+1) Forever & a Day

“This seems disturbingly familiar,” Nick called as he watched Kelly climb up onto the boat with their bags in hand. He set the bags down by the door, then jumped back down to the dock and joined back up with Nick where he’d left him.

Kelly laughed, wrapping his arm around Nick’s shoulder. “Yeah, except this time there won’t be any sex until the doctor clears you,” he said.

Nick gave him a hurt look. “But you’re the doc,” he pointed out.

“Yep, and I say no sex until you can… what was it? Sit up on your own and pass a field sobriety test.” Kelly had to bite his lip at the expression on Nick’s face. God, a drugged Nick was a hilarious Nick. He needed to record this and send it to the rest of Sidewinder for future blackmail. 

“I don’t remember torturing you like this when I was staying with you after New Orleans.”

Kelly helped him limp forward. “Watch your step getting up onto the boat,” he said. “And clearly your memories of the time in my cabin are very different from mine. I was in a constant state of torture starting from the moment you kissed me.”

Nick stumbled with the movement of the boat, and Kelly wrapped his arm more securely before helping him down the steps. They were narrow, not enough room for both men standing side by side, so Kelly went first, letting Nick lean on his shoulder like a crutch. 

“I still don’t think--” Nick cut off, stumbling into Kelly’s back. “Ow, Doc, what the hell?”

Kelly had stopped dead on the step in front of him. “Um, minor problem, Irish,” he winced. He took another step down, then one more, and finally Nick could see what had surprised Kelly.

The boat was a disaster. There were mattresses in the middle of the salon’s floor, sheets and clothes covered in grease paint, dirt, and god only knew what else strewn about. Shotgun spray decorated the walls, and there was a faint odor of spoiled food coming from the kitchen.

“Oh. Forgot about that.”

Kelly laughed. “Yeah, me too.” He helped Nick down the last few steps, then maneuvered him to the couch, which was thankfully clear of debris. A minute of searching found the TV remote under a pile of camo that Kelly was pretty sure belonged to Digger. “Here, find something to watch while I try to get this place cleaned up a bit.”

Nick looked up, alarmed. “ _You’re_ going to clean?” He sounded horrified by the thought.

“I can clean!” Kelly protested.

“I’ve seen your idea of cleaning,” Nick said, using the remote to point at his lover. “You ‘cleaned’ the house in Jacksonville once by shoving everything into the closet in Eli and Ty’s room, and Eli spent like three hours frantically cleaning it all properly before Ty got home and freaked out.”

“Yeah,” Kelly said with a smile. “Good times.”

“I’ll call a maid service in the morning.”

Kelly opened his mouth to protest, then closed it. He _hated_ cleaning, why was he fighting Nick on this? “Okay, fine,” he said. “But I should probably at least pick up the weapons and spare clips that are lying around. It looks like _Guns & Ammo_ meets a frat house in here.”

Nick winced. “Yeah, fair enough,” he said. He yawned then, trying valiantly to hide it behind his hand.

Kelly disappeared for a second, coming back with the thick blanket from Nick’s bed. “You should rest,” he said. “I’ll get unpacked, you nap, and we’ll order Thai later. Want a pain pill?”

“No, I’m fine,” Nick said. 

“Sure,” Kelly dragged out the word, but didn’t push the issue. “Sleep. It’s my turn to take care of you.”

“I’m terrified,” Nick said, but he smiled and closed his eyes, falling asleep to the sound of Kelly moving about his boat and the gentle rocking of the waves beneath him.

***

Nick woke to sunlight on his face and the sound of baseball on the TV. He turned his head, squinting against the light, and froze.

“ABBOTT!”

Kelly poked his head around the hallway, not looking worried or surprised by Nick’s shout. “What’s up, Irish?” he asked. “Feeling okay?”

Nick tried to sit up, felt the stitched in his side tug painfully, and fell back with a huff and a glare. “Why the hell is _that_ on my TV?”

“I thought you liked baseball, O,” Kelly said innocently. His eyes, gray-blue and bright, were wide, but he couldn’t hide the smile that tugged at the corner of his lips.

“ _That_ is not baseball,” Nick ranted. He flung his arm towards the screen. “The Yankees, Doc? The _Yankees_? On _my_ TV?”

Kelly couldn’t hold it anymore, and he burst out laughing, falling against the wall as he lost his balance and clutched his chest. “Oh god, Irish,” he said, struggling to breathe around the hysterics. “I’m sorry, I couldn’t help myself.”

“I’m contemplating never speaking to you again,” Nick said.

Kelly pushed himself off the wall, wiping tears from his eyes. “Come on, Nicko, it’s not that bad,” he said. 

“It _is_ that bad,” Nick grumbled. “Where’s the remote, I need to turn this trash off.”

“I’ve got it,” Kelly said. He snagged the remote off the coffee table and flipped channels quickly, stopping on a Discovery Channel documentary.

“You’re cruel,” Nick said.

“I’m sorry,” Kelly said again. He leaned over the couch, blocking the sunlight from Nick’s face. “Forgive me?”

Nick looked up, taking in Kelly’s eyes still shining with laughter and his bright smile. There hadn’t been much to laugh at in the last few months, and he’d missed seeing Kelly like this, open and carefree. “I could be convinced,” he said at last. “For a price.”

Kelly’s eyes darkened. “And what price would that be?”

“A kiss?”

Kelly seemed to consider this for a second. “I guess the doctor could allow kissing, if the patient promises to stay relaxed.”

“The patient will promise anything you want if you’ll just get your ass down here,” Nick said.

Kelly leaned down, running his hands along Nick’s cheek, down his neck and shoulders, and then down to his side, hovering over the white bandages that still covered stitches and angry red scars. Then he moved back up, cupping Nick’s face and pressing their lips together.

Nick forced himself not to push into the kiss, knowing Kelly would pull back if he thought Nick was straining himself. He nipped at Kelly’s lower lip, then let Kelly take over, deepening the kiss until everything else was forgotten except the feel of Kelly’s lips against his own.

They pulled apart slowly, trading soft kisses until Kelly finally inhaled and tried to stand.

Nick refused to let him go. “Come lay down with me?” he asked.

Kelly gave him a soft smile. “Yeah, alright,” he agreed. He helped Nick roll to his good side, propping a pillow beneath his head, then slid carefully onto the couch behind him. Their legs tangled together, and Kelly wrapped his arm around Nick’s chest, holding him up. He could feel Nick breathing beneath his arm, and spread his fingers to feel Nick’s heart beating. “Love you, Irish,” he whispered.

“Love you too, Doc,” Nick responded.


End file.
